You know it's not gonna be good when you have the title as such!!!
So for all those that read this for inspiring or help...my apologies...but real life happens and I just have to get this out....so, sorry!~
It's a VERY frustrating post!!!
(I'll have to post this later...due to my anger issues and having to get happy for tonight!)
Here we go...I was waiting for a son to write some things in his "Foreign" tongue....but I can't wait any longer...Maybe I will add it later...who knows.
I knew Wednesday was going to be rough for J at school. AKA Stomach problems, so I warned them, told them not to push the eating..that he would probably wig at restroom time.
Well, there was no phone calls like in the past if J was having a rough time.
(this is where I think the problems occurred...no communications!)
I went to pick up J at the usual time, and he wasn't in the room. The aides told the teacher I was waiting outside and both her and the assist. princ. came out.
Oh, CRAP! I've had this happen before.
They told me J had a rough day, "got" the teachers 5x's (the note only said 3...but by the third, I should have been called to get him or been informed at what he was doing and wiggin')
Then they lead me into a room right next door where it's quiet and there I saw him...It was a shock to say the least. He was in a hard wooden chair, kinda like a high chair for adults, the only thing he could move was his head. He was facing the wall.
Okay...my heart sank. I understand having him face the wall, but for how long...how long was he in this chair. I was told by the assist. that most children like this...well, this was the first for me and the last! What happened to the padded room? At least there he was able to move around and not hurt any one.
WHY WASN'T I CALLED!
Okay, to top that off...the aide (I'm hoping this person isn't a teacher) in fact this individual is part of the "take-down" squad. Said very openly....and I quote,
"I'm Pissed off that they gave me a bunch of hard students this year!"
and then added as this individual was releasing J from the restraint,
"J, don't hit me, keep your hands to yourself!"
Seriously, do you put candy in front of a child and say, don't eat it...I mean it...don't touch the candy...use your brain for heavens sake!
Yup, right in front of me...that was professional. This is who is working with my son? Don't get me wrong...when he is not feeling good, it takes alot, you might get some markings or bruises, might have to replace a shirt or two...but holy cow, you signed up for it, you get paid more then a regular aide.
As J is being released, they ask if I want to keep him in the chair and wheel him out. Are you serious? NO! I simply told J in a MOM'S voice, "Let's go, it's time to get in the car". and we left! No assistance, no wigs. He got in the car, looked at me and I asked him if it was a rough day, J's reply...yes. That's was it. Silence for 20 minutes. Not the usual excitement of getting the cars and tagging them, going under the bridges...just silence.
So you ask, now what are you going to do?
I don't know...take a break from school?
Not take him back until his stomach is good? (NEVER!)
Wait until after surgery...oh, wait...we haven't a clue when J's surgery is going to be.
Trust is a big issue with us, we've been through (use the swear word here from down under) and back.
This is a mountain, I don't know if we are up for climbing right now. J only has until December of next year and then what?
Was it really necessary to dissolve his teachers from last year who understood his stomach and communicated so the day would end on a positive note?
I haven't a clue how I'm going to get J into the car now.
The day ended negatively and J will remember.
He's still not letting anyone touch him, be close to him...so now I need to show the only thing I know how to show, a mothers' love and patience.
So for now, school isn't in the picture...Diet Coke is!
I knew Wednesday was going to be rough for J at school. AKA Stomach problems, so I warned them, told them not to push the eating..that he would probably wig at restroom time.
Well, there was no phone calls like in the past if J was having a rough time.
(this is where I think the problems occurred...no communications!)
I went to pick up J at the usual time, and he wasn't in the room. The aides told the teacher I was waiting outside and both her and the assist. princ. came out.
Oh, CRAP! I've had this happen before.
They told me J had a rough day, "got" the teachers 5x's (the note only said 3...but by the third, I should have been called to get him or been informed at what he was doing and wiggin')
Then they lead me into a room right next door where it's quiet and there I saw him...It was a shock to say the least. He was in a hard wooden chair, kinda like a high chair for adults, the only thing he could move was his head. He was facing the wall.
Okay...my heart sank. I understand having him face the wall, but for how long...how long was he in this chair. I was told by the assist. that most children like this...well, this was the first for me and the last! What happened to the padded room? At least there he was able to move around and not hurt any one.
WHY WASN'T I CALLED!
Okay, to top that off...the aide (I'm hoping this person isn't a teacher) in fact this individual is part of the "take-down" squad. Said very openly....and I quote,
"I'm Pissed off that they gave me a bunch of hard students this year!"
and then added as this individual was releasing J from the restraint,
"J, don't hit me, keep your hands to yourself!"
Seriously, do you put candy in front of a child and say, don't eat it...I mean it...don't touch the candy...use your brain for heavens sake!
Yup, right in front of me...that was professional. This is who is working with my son? Don't get me wrong...when he is not feeling good, it takes alot, you might get some markings or bruises, might have to replace a shirt or two...but holy cow, you signed up for it, you get paid more then a regular aide.
As J is being released, they ask if I want to keep him in the chair and wheel him out. Are you serious? NO! I simply told J in a MOM'S voice, "Let's go, it's time to get in the car". and we left! No assistance, no wigs. He got in the car, looked at me and I asked him if it was a rough day, J's reply...yes. That's was it. Silence for 20 minutes. Not the usual excitement of getting the cars and tagging them, going under the bridges...just silence.
So you ask, now what are you going to do?
I don't know...take a break from school?
Not take him back until his stomach is good? (NEVER!)
Wait until after surgery...oh, wait...we haven't a clue when J's surgery is going to be.
Trust is a big issue with us, we've been through (use the swear word here from down under) and back.
This is a mountain, I don't know if we are up for climbing right now. J only has until December of next year and then what?
Was it really necessary to dissolve his teachers from last year who understood his stomach and communicated so the day would end on a positive note?
I haven't a clue how I'm going to get J into the car now.
The day ended negatively and J will remember.
He's still not letting anyone touch him, be close to him...so now I need to show the only thing I know how to show, a mothers' love and patience.
So for now, school isn't in the picture...Diet Coke is!
2 comments:
I marvel at your spirit and your strength to follow your feelings. You are close to your heavenly father so keep relying on Him. But listen to what He tells you and keep an open mind because He might inspire you to do something you are not comfortable with. Teachers are human and some just don't know the world of Josh. You may have to teach them and pray for them. You are entitled to all the inspiration that there is - you just have to prepare yourself to listen and walk accordingly. Remember, being mad does not solve anything - nice release of steam - but like a pressure cooker - some cold water makes it possible to enjoy what is inside. And the inside is what counts. Please don't burn any bridges because you might have to walk a path that needs that bridge and your Heavenly Father can't help you unless you listen for that sweet spirit. You have had choice experiences being in the temple for even a short time - let those experiences and what you see and witness guide what you do with Josh and with his teachers. Ask your self - What would my Saviour do???? And listen for the promptings.
We love you and pray for you, your family and especially Josh. The Lord truely loves you and wants to help. Listen - and follow what you are prompted to do.
Love ya
Mom and Dad
I am so sorry that you and Josh both had such a rough time of it all. I can't imagine how hurtful it was to both of you. Your Mom and Dad's post was great. If you need someone to talk to or to come over and just sound off to I am here! Love you!
Becky
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